Dress: & Other Stories, Trainers: Levis, Beret: Topshop, Sunglasses: Jimmy Fairly and Basket: Fonott
I feel like I live my life in a constant state of ‘fuck it, buy the shoes’, and ‘help me I’m poor’. One half of me always screaming go out, buy everything, you might die tomorrow and you can’t take it with you, but then the other half insisting that I must list half of my belongings on Depop in order to survive for the next week... Recently I’ve heard a fair bit of sad news and I guess that massively makes me sway toward the former, less shit giving version of myself. I've definitely slipped and fell into a few unnecessary-but-absolutely-necessary purchases of late, but I am definitely trying to be more considerate with my purchases and I think ultimately, it’s all about balance.
On the whole I’d say I’m generally pretty good with my money and although will treat myself and have a little splurge sometimes, I always try to get rid of stuff in order to fund and make space for the new. If i'm after a new designer bag for example, I make myself get rid of a few pricey pieces in order to be able to treat myself without the guilt or the having to eat beans for the next month or two dreaded situation. I also get the guilt so bad after buying lots of/ expensive things and instantly feel the need to clear out my wardrobe and list some things on my Depop/ Ebay to keep the balance - both in monetary and space values. I think it can be a little overwhelming sometimes too. I mean, don’t get me wrong I LOVE clothes, and essentially part of my job is to share the new things i get and what I wear on the daily (which would be pretty boring if it was the same get up day in, day out) but anything in excess can be bad. Sometimes I’ll only wear things once because the influx of newness means that I literally don’t have the time to re-wear and that makes me feel guilty and actually a bit sad. Also, the amount of excess packaging that comes along side the influx of newness is pretty sad too. I always try to re-use packaging for everything i sell on Depop which is a start at least!
I used to be such a hoarder but I’ve literally come full circle and am quite ruthless with my wardrobe now - space also being a massive factor alongside necessity and the practicality of me only really wearing things a few times due to sharing everything with you guys. As I get older I’m realising more and more that I don’t just want a wardrobe full of ‘stuff’, I want a wardrobe full of pieces that I love and that I will wear over and over again and can style in hundreds of different ways. I want vintage, high street and high end treasures that I can pass on to my future daughter the way I have so many pieces that used to be my Mama’s. I guess what I’m trying to say is that the pressure to always have something new, the instant gratification and the lure of the swipe up is unrealistic and 100% unsustainable. I love shopping and I love sharing all the new things I find/ buy/ want with you, however just wanted to share the reality that I don’t have seventeen wardrobes full of clothes and that I work on a cycle of out with the old and in with the new, just at pace! The best way to say fuck it and buy the shoes, without following with the dreaded help me I’m poor. Rachael x
Sadly can't find the dress i'm wearing online but have linked lots of similar options below for you!
Photos by Bekky Lonsdale